to fulfill people's expectations used to be very essential to me, whether it is concerning my achievement in education, relationship or merely looks. basically, it pushes me to be better but at the same time, the burden that is dragged along is for no joke. not that i'd abandon people's expectations completely after this but i'm getting myself on my own pace despite the odds that are ready to weigh me up. people can expect whatever stuffs and shits they want but this is my life i'm talking about. plus most of the time, people only know half and less of the story and problems i am going through. hence, people literally need to switch themselves off sometimes; it'd be inspiring ENOUGH. 

it might be in the way that i overcome and handle things on my own that lead to some misunderstandings but then again, nobody can guarantee that heaven and earth are alligned, in other words, no beings know everything. to reflect myself, i don't throw every problems around like confetti just to let the world know that i'm having the worst day ever or when i feel like i am futile as fuck. i don't. when i feel like the time is right, i'll burst out and clarify things up, of course, to the right people. for sure, i'll express hard. 

i'll be 20 next year and i should be better at this. 

to fulfill people's expectations used to be very essential to me, whether it is concerning my achievement in education, relationship or merely looks. basically, it pushes me to be better but at the same time, the burden that is dragged along is for no joke. not that i'd abandon people's expectations completely after this but i'm getting myself on my own pace despite the odds that are ready to weigh me up. people can expect whatever stuffs and shits they want but this is my life i'm talking about. plus most of the time, people only know half and less of the story and problems i am going through. hence, people literally need to switch themselves off sometimes; it'd be inspiring ENOUGH. 

it might be in the way that i overcome and handle things on my own that lead to some misunderstandings but then again, nobody can guarantee that heaven and earth are alligned, in other words, no beings know everything. to reflect myself, i don't throw every problems around like confetti just to let the world know that i'm having the worst day ever or when i feel like i am futile as fuck. i don't. when i feel like the time is right, i'll burst out and clarify things up, of course, to the right people. for sure, i'll express hard. 

i'll be 20 next year and i should be better at this.